Participation

Last night I got into an elevator carrying one of my daughter's 4 trophies from the beauty pageant she was in. An old man and his wife entered after we did and he gave me a condescending look. Then, he looked at the other trophies being held by my sons and asked, "Was there a trophy give away?"

"My daughter competed in a beauty pageant, these are her trophies."

"Are those all participation trophies? I can't believe they give kids trophies just for participating these days."

"Uh, you don't get the big ones like these for just participating." I replied with a bit of pride and a little annoyance.

The elevator door opened and we went our separate ways. I don't know if he was trying to belittle us or my daughter but I was slightly perturbed by his supposition that my daughter merely participated. She didn't win, but she didn't just participate. My boys and I were carrying a first place trophy for one category, a fourth place trophy in another category, the overall third place trophy and the old man's derisive participation trophy.

Later, after I had forgotten about the old man and his questions, I talked with my daughter about what the weekend meant to her. I cried with pride and she cried with joy. That first place trophy was hard won, with many hours of practice over the last 13 years. Also, coming in third overall was a real accomplishment. There were 75 other young ladies gunning for that overall crown. My daughter was beaten by two older more experienced contestants. Third overall was fantastic. But I wasn't proud of her for those two great accomplishments.

Six months ago when she asked me if she could do the pageant this year I told her no. Financially we could not afford it. We had other family priorities that came before a beauty pageant. She countered with, "what if I pay for it myself." I found out last night that she expected me to say no. She was sure I would say no because she was aware of what the family priorities were. She had a plan and she had her arguments ready. The discussion that night was slightly heated but in the end she convinced me that she could do it. I gave her my blessing that night.

Then last night the picture of why she wanted to participate became more clear. She knew the experience would be one of growth. She had certain things that she wanted to improve. To make those improvements she put herself in a competitive environment that would force her to learn new skills. Skills that she will take with her for the rest of her life.

My daughter's story wasn't the only inspirational one on stage last night. There was one contestant who was obviously smart and confident but in previous years was very timid in front of the microphone. This year she was much improved. She even said that she had finally beaten stage fright. There was the severely handicapped contestant who has struggled through her whole life. But there she was, on stage, defying her handicap and looking beautiful. Each contestant on stage had their own story. It wasn't easy for them to submit themselves to judgement. They were all an inspiration.

The old man was even more of a jerk than he realized. I realize now, on this particular occasion, that participation trophy was the most valuable trophy of all.

Why chase the dream?

I have been having a conversation with a good friend about future plans. He is a couple of years ahead of me in experience and dropped some insight that challenged me to answer a question: Why chase the dream of owning your own business?

Growing up I was exposed to the entrepreneurial spirit. My grandfather started his own business while working full time. He ended up passing the business on to my uncle. Was it as big or profitable as the consulting company I work for? Not by a far stretch, but it employed 30-40 people each year and was a good place to work. More importantly though the business was a legacy to me and my family.

As a family we were proud of the business. We were proud of my grandfather and what he had built. My uncle took it to a new level when he took over and we were proud of that too. Pride in accomplishment of the family is what we had. I miss that feeling and that is what I am looking to achieve. I have been on this search for a while without knowing what it was that I was looking for. I knew I was looking to build something that I could call mine, but I didn't know why.

Why are you chasing your dream?

Product Development Lesson: Abigail's Purse

A little over a year ago I sat with my daughter after dinner one night and we chatted about entrepreneurship. She was 13 going on 14 but she understood the concept and started to run with it. We talked about what would be a good product. She was going through a very crafty phase. Not crafty as in mischievous, but crafty as in she was painting, building origami, and making artsy things. She enjoyed it and I suggested we should find one of those craft projects that other people might like and turn it into something people would like to buy. We decided one particular project had promise. The craft project was a handbag woven with plastic strips.

She got to work trying to change a craft project into a product. The first discussion was the materials. I told her we were never going to be able to find plastic strips, but we looked on the internet anyway. Nothing was available. I thought we would have to have the strips made for us specifically. So we started talking about alternatives to plastic strips. She came up with using ribbon instead. I liked it because I thought it would make the purse soft and warm vs the cold hard plastic. So we made a trip to Michael's and purchased a ton of ribbon. Problem number two, we had to find a better supplier of ribbon, Michael's was expensive.

She started making the purse out of ribbon and quickly found the next problem. Ribbon doesn't stand up like plastic does. Being the trooper that she is, she tried to make that work as hard as she could. Finally she mentioned that she was having a problem. She needed some kind of support system to allow her to weave. We spent a week or two thinking about this problem and talking about solutions. We tried a couple and failed and some how ended up ruining the ribbon.

This time we went to Joanne's for the ribbon. Who knew ribbon would be so expensive. We got a couple of blocks of styrofoam from Michael to serve as the support system. We cut the styrofoam to the size of the purse, wrapped it in plastic wrap and off Abigail went to build another purse.

This time it was a success. We talked about the fit and finish, it needed a liner, and some kind of tough base. What we ended up with was the purse you see above. I thought it was pretty awesome. She started using it to carry all of her dance gear. And then we stopped working on the purse.

Yesterday we were walking through Wal-Mart and we saw rows and rows of woven bags. A year has gone by since we started working on the purse. But the first thing Abigail said to me when she saw the purses, "They found the plastic strips." The bags are bigger. They are for going to the beach. They are rugged and cold. And they are $7. Each of Abigail's purses were in the $30 range just in ribbon.

The night before the trip to Wal-Mart Abigail mentioned she was ready to do the purses again. That night I searched for ribbon again and I purchased a ton of ribbon that I had found very cheap, 1/40th the cost of Michael's and Joanne's. The ribbon will show up some time soon, and we will make a couple more purses. Hopefully someone on eBay will find them as wonderful as we do and pay a decent price for them.

Lessons:
* Someone always has the same idea
* Get your product out as quickly as you can
* Keep searching for lower cost materials (without sacrificing quality of course)

Don't hurt your spleen!!

Son (via chat): Mom says you have to feed me today.
Me: I promise to feed you, but if you start feeling a little light headed, feel free to feed yourself. (He's 15 afterall...)
Son: Alright, but if I die, it is on your head.
Me: If you die it will effect more than my head. I will hurt in my head, my heart and in my spleen too.
Son: Your spleen?!?! I'd better not die in that case. Don't want you to have a hurt spleen.